We’re all guilty of browsing social networking sites, nosing into other people’s lives from the comfort of our sofas. We see friends quaffing champagne on desert islands, Cara Delevingne backstage at the latest Burberry shoot, exotic weddings in Florence, crazy festival antics at Glastonbury or one of the endless health and fitness bloggers who’s only practised yoga, walked their dog, made a paleo breakfast and applied magazine-perfect make up in time for a selfie, before 6am!
But have you ever wondered what these images do our subconscious? What effect constantly comparing ourselves with the lives of our piers – who appear to be having THE best fun, with THE best people, in THE best places – has on our mental health?
It knocks our self-esteem that’s what! Because we can’t keep up– we end up feeling boring, unattractive, uninventive and certainly unworthy. Yet like an addictive drug, we’re not prepared to give up this toxic habit.
So as an alternative to quitting those voyeuristic tendencies, Technotox has come up with 10 tips to counterbalance any negativity and Boost your Self-Esteem!
- DON’T EXAGGERATE YOUR FAULTS
Start noticing the exaggerated statements that come out of your mouth – ‘I am such a selfish cow’, ‘I have the fattest thighs of all my friends’, ‘I am always so damn forgetful’ – and replace them with more realistic ones like ‘I can be a bit selfish at times’, ‘my thighs are larger than I would hope but they’re not as big as they could be!’ etc.
Make an effort to employ your observer mindset and make sure you rephrase exaggerations with more realistic, positive statements.
- START EACH DAY WITH GRATITUDE
Your mind is very impressionable at first waking, so the thoughts you give it in those early hours can have a lasting effect. Make sure you give yourself the best chance of a good day, by starting your day with positive, grateful thoughts to set you on the right path.
- REGULARLY AUDIT YOUR VALUES
As humans we are changing all the time, and so do our values. Remind yourself of the core values that guide your life and check your behavior and choices against them. If your life and values are aligned, confidence and happiness can be found in abundance.
- NOTICE YOUR KINDNESS TOWARDS OTHERS
We are often kinder to strangers than we are to ourselves, in fact people with low self-esteem often think of themselves as selfish because they’re overly absorbed with their own insecurities. Start to notice when and how often you are kind to others. You’ll be amazed at how frequently you are and hopefully can start to appreciate your naturally altruistic nature. The next step is to be kind to yourself as much!
- LAUGH MORE!
Allow yourself time to watch more comedy. Book to see a funny film or play, or support your local comedy store. Laughing helps us escape our problems and encourages a broader, brighter perspective. It also strengthens our immune systems. Ho ho ho.
- ACTIVATE YOUR RIGHT BRAIN AND LET THE LEFT BRAIN SLEEP!
The left-brain is responsible for controlling reasoning, communication, learning, logic and organisation, so by regularly letting it sleep you allow the right brain to take over. The right brain is the creative, emotional side, which can be explored with meditation, painting, playing music, and burning aromatic candles. Find ways you can activate yours!
- LOOK TO TOMORROW
Most days are fairly predictable, but we can never plan fully for the future because we have no control over what might happen. What we can do is at the end of each day, look forward to tomorrow and think about what we could do better. What would make it more satisfying? Give it more meaning?
- LEARN FOR THE LOVE OF LEARNING
Learning about new subjects, topics and trends can be a great self-esteem boost because we feel a great sense of achievement once the learning is done. You might not have a logical reason to start learning about something new, but your mental health will be very pleased with you!
- BE COMFORTABLE WITH SOLITUDE
Solitude can be difficult at first because negative childhood fears can arise around being lonely and afraid, but practicing solitude – a little at a time – can be very healthy in the long run, because you learn to be with and accept yourself fully.
- MAKE A WORLDLY CONTRIBUTION
Giving money to a local charity, your time to volunteer or supporting a global cause can help you feel a part of something bigger. Better yet, keep it a secret and you’ll know it’s something for you and the whole world to share alone, not for impressing others.