When I ask you to listen to me
and you start giving advice,
you have not done what I asked.

When I ask you to listen to me
and you begin to tell me why I should’t feel that way
you are trampling on my feelings.

When I ask you to listen to me
and you feel you have to do something to solve my problem,
then you have failed me, strange as it may seem.

Listen! All I asked was that you listen,
not talk or do-just hear me.
And I can do for myself; i’m not helpless.
Maybe discouraged and faltering, but not helpless.

When you do something for me that I can and need to do for myself,
you contribute to my fear and weakness.

But when you accept as a simple fact that I do feel what I feel,
no matter how irrational.
then I can stop trying to convince you and get on with the business of understanding what’s behind this irrational feeling.
And when that’s clear the answers are obvious and I don’t need advice.
irrational feelings make sense when we understand what’s behind them.

Perhaps that’s why prayer works, sometimes, for some people,
because their god is mute, and he doesn’t give advice or try to fix things.
He just listens and lets you work it out for yourself.

So please just listen and just hear me.
And if you want to talk, wait a minute for your turn;
And i’ll listen to you.

(Listen by anonymous)