All posts filed under: personal development

Who’s been to the School of Love?

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From a young age we’re inundated with ideas about love. From the perfection of Hollywood movies to the romance of classic novels, like sponges we absorb ideals of what the perfect relationship should look like. It is rich with red-hot desire and passion, holds the patience of a saint and the utmost respect. But best of all no matter who or what we are, we all deserve it. In fact, isn’t it our basic human right to experience the ultimate romantic love? True love doesn’t require effort or patience, or a compromise of ourselves. True love just happens, regardless of our own imperfections and selfishness. If it takes work, surely it’s not real? Then at some point along the path to adulthood, a sharp prick bursts our bubble and reality is revealed. Love isn’t easy. It does require effort. A great deal of effort at times. In fact it’s an ongoing balancing act that requires active participation and very clear and concise levels of communication. Like a garden requires nurturing, a loving relationship needs feeding, pruning and …

Are You Ready to Make A Change?

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“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.” Marianne Williamson I want to introduce you all to the power of coaching, as I firmly believe each and every one of you would benefit from having a life coach. Contrary to popular belief, coaching isn’t therapy or counselling. Coaches don’t offer advice, nor dwell in the past. Instead, they work with you as an individual, focusing on the whole person, helping to evoke dramatic and permanent change. And create a more satisfying future. I recently trained with the Coaches Training Institute (CTI) which is recognized by the International Coaches Federation. I practice the CTI “Co-Active coaching” method, which involves the active and collaborative participation of both the coach and client in a thought-provoking and creative process. Inspiring the client to maximize their personal potential. It is a proven approach based on CTI’s many years of experience working with clients and coaches worldwide. This method can be applied …

An Inspiring Expression of Man’s Heart and Mind

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I often share the words of Kahlil Gibran in my Poetry Friday posts, so today is dedicated to the source of that poetry – his best selling book The Prophet. The Prophet is a collection of 26 essays written in English by the Lebanese artist. A masterpiece, it has been translated into more than 20 languages and is considered one of the most loved classics of our time. Gibran was also a philosopher and each chapter provides us with wise insight on how to approach different aspects of our life. These topics include love, children, giving, work, joy and sorrow, laws, freedom, reason and passion, pain, self-knowledge, teaching, friendship, talking, time, pleasure, beauty and death. It is a profound and spiritual read containing many a simple truth, expressed with poetic fluidity. It is a book that can be read over and over again, or dipped in and out of when inspiration is needed. I would highly recommend you invest in a copy – and another for a friend, because it makes a great present and is certainly a book that needs to be …

The Power of Vulnerability

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Vulnerability is a big and powerful topic, yet Brené Brown handles it with simplicity and humour in this poignant TED Talk. A researcher in human connection, Brené talks about shame and fear and their power to stop us from connecting with others. She shares a deep insight from her research – a revelation that resulted in her seeing a therapist for twelve months – and the factors that need to be present for a strong sense of love and belonging to be present in all our lives. It is a wonderful 20 minute talk and if you enjoy it, please share its message with others.

The Art of Letting Go

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It’s human nature to attach ourselves to things. People, places, ideas – we grasp at them in the hope of finding happiness. Trying to manipulate each one to fit into our lives just the way we had imagined. But the reality is, this attachment is the cause of our suffering. This clinging to ourselves and an idealised life, sets the path for disappointment and dissonance. We find ourselves in situations we can’t control, meeting people with different perspectives and fighting our own egos in the face of adversity. ‘You can only lose what you cling to.’ — Buddha Letting go is an art form. For the more spiritual or those that lean towards the ‘being’ side, it may come more easily, but for the doers it is incredibly difficult to give up control and the desire to try and ‘fix’ things. So learning takes time and commitment. Here are 6 useful words to aid in your learning – 1. ACCEPTANCE If you find yourself in a toxic situation or conversation, first remove yourself from it and take …

Redefine Success and Create a Happier Life

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When Arianna Huffington collapsed from exhaustion in 2007, she was forced to take a long hard look at her life and redefine what success meant to her. With her health so visibly deteriorating, the classic notions of success as money and power, were irrelevant. If she wasn’t alive, both would cease to matter. In her book THRIVE, we are introduced to a third metric of success. A metric that consists of four equal pillars. The pillars represent Wellbeing, Wisdom, Wonder and Giving and they make up the four chapters of her excellent book. An impassioned read, Arianna encourages us to look within ourselves and build a more meaningful and fulfilling life, aligned with our values. Touching on the importance of sleep and meditation to nourish our minds and bodies. We are also introduced to the power of giving back to our local communities and the joys of delighting in wonder. Something we rarely give ourselves the time to do. “Disconnecting from our technology to reconnect with ourselves is absolutely essential for wisdom.” Arianna Huffington Each page is filled with wisdom and insight, and I would …

10 Benefits of Meditation

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Evidence suggests meditation has been around since 1500 BCE, making it over 3500 years old. Yet the art of meditation only spread to Western society thousands of years later, and has only really gained household popularity in the last decade. What is about this ancient art form that’s survived the test of time and why do so many religions and gurus swear by its healing properties? We’ve chosen our top 10 benefits – It boosts Positive Emotions
 Powerful contemplative meditations like loving-kindness act as triggers for positive emotions. When we recall and allow ourselves to cultivate loving feelings, not only does it boost our mood, but we can more easily access those feelings after the mood has passed. Positive effect on our Physical Health Meditating encourages us to relax and therefore helps to reduce our stress level and boosts our immunity. It has also been proven to boost our immunity. Helps fight Depression Results now show that MBCT (Mindfulness Based Cognitive Therapy) is just as effective as anti-depressants in fighting mental illness. This is revolutionary for those who are …

How Well Do You Look After Your Mental Health?

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Our brains produce up to a staggering 50,000 thoughts per day (National Science Foundation). 95% of those thoughts are habitual and repeated on an almost daily basis. If you’re a naturally skeptical or negative person whose mind is filled with worry and anxiety, it’s inevitable this storm of gloomy, negative thoughts is going to have a frightening impact on your mental health and wellbeing. Especially since our thoughts govern our actions – “All that we are is a result of all that we have thought.” Buddha One very important way to look after our mental health, is to take a regular mental inventory of our thoughts to assess what we’re creating in our lives. How much time is spent worrying or complaining? Criticising ourself and others? How much time appreciating the things we do have instead of noticing everything we don’t? Looking at our lives with wonder and gratitude?  If what we experience now is a result of our past thoughts, then we’re creating our future with every new thought. If our thoughts are positive and encouraging, then we’re more likely to act in an uplifting …

6 Steps to Reconnect

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Connection with other people is fundamental to our happiness and wellbeing. Yet with the rise of digital technology and online social networking sites, you would think the opposite was true. The lack of face-to-face connection is having devastating effects on society, with social isolation and the loneliness epidemic reaching all time highs. On par with early death through cause of smoking and obesity. We can certainly reverse this negative impact and through very simple means increase our connectivity levels. Here are a few simple steps to get you started – CALL AN OLD FRIEND It’s automatic to text a friend or write a quick email between meetings at work, but there’s nothing quite like hearing someones voice when you actually take the time to pick up the phone and call them PAY SOMEONE A COMPLIMENT A stranger on the street, your boss or the local chemist. Whoever your path might cross with, make a point to give at least one compliment each and every day. You’ll be amazed at the positive impact a little kindness and small  connection (even with a complete …

The Rise of Spirituality

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People often confuse Spirituality with Religious belief or worse, ‘that wishy washy hippy stuff‘. But in truth, anyone who wants to be the best version of themselves, or strives to live a life with meaning and purpose, is Spiritual. Or for that matter, anyone who has a connection to a higher sense of self –  and believes there is more to living, than just our own subjective existence. Spirituality relates to the soul and is not a tangible or measurable physical matter. It is the connection of the mind and emotions to the spirit and something greater than ourselves. Through reflection and realignment, to be spiritual is to refine who you are. To understand your personal values – what you find most important in life and what motivates you – and to live the most meaningful life, in line with those values. As more and more of us find our social conscience and strive to look for meaning and purpose, in the vast options available to us, we’re turning to our Spiritual selves to find the answers. What are your …